Trying to Stay Standing

Life has been super busy for me lately. I've found myself busy working on many projects, some of them have been easy and others have taken much time and focus. In addition, I've had some time to get away for retreat to glean and grow. And of course, the fact that we all are human means we all have the potential to hurt or be hurt from time to time. I feel like things have been spinning so quickly all around me and yet things are normal too. It seems like a whirlwind and yet like calm. It seems like everything and nothing all at once.

While at retreat, we stayed at a house on the beach, the waves were constantly crashing over and over and over again! They were non-stop and they were strong. There was no peace in the water all weekend long. On one afternoon I had some down time and had the privilege of playing in the waves with my friends. It was SO rough and it was extremely difficult to stay in the same area. Yes, sure I know we tend to be shifted off course on a normal day in the water but this day it took SO MUCH work to remain even close to the area we wanted to stay in. You know, we get in the water in one spot and when we next look up we are off center from that spot by a little bit. Well, this time the water was so forceful and constant that to remain standing was quite a job, much less staying near our 'area' while in the water. It was a constant struggle to stay in line with our stuff. It was fun and it was nice to let the waves crash into us but I felt like I couldn't remain in the water as long as usual because the force didn't let up. So we took a break a lot sooner than we would have on an ordinary day at the beach.

Lately I feel like the waves of life are treating me much the same way as the water did. Every time I stand up to get things back in order or try to find our start spot again... another crashing blow comes and knocks me under again. Then I'm forced to stand up again, wipe off my face so that I can see clearly again, find my marker, fight to get back to my start point to only be knocked over again. Wave after wave after wave crashing and crashing and growing in strength as my strength is waning. Some days I want to come up to find that place of peace again, and although it does come... I find another wave knocking me down again - leaving me seeking that place of peace again.

I'm trying to keep on keeping on but on some days I find it difficult to stand up again. I'm trying to strive and I need to rest. There's much to be said about that alone but I'm still walking this out so no clarity yet. I do know God is with me and He never leaves me. I know that He is my strength but I don't know how to keep that thought in my focus versus looking for the next blow. All I know is He is my all in all and after reading this scripture I felt comforted. I haven't made sense of this all yet but I keep pressing on.... I can't stop getting up again. That's the least I can do at this point. Keep on standing up again.

"The righteous cry out, and the Lord hears them; he delivers them from all their troubles. The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. A righteous man may have many troubles, but the Lord delivers them from them all; he protects all his bones, not one of them will be broken. The Lord redeems his servants, no one will be condemned who takes refuge in Him." Psalm 34:17-20, 22

To Live Life or To Live a Schedule

I recently heard the following comment: "There are two types of families. One whose schedule revolves around life and one whose life revolves around a schedule." I know as my kids get older and start showing interest in activities that the temptation is to overbook our life. I know it takes intention to keep life at the center of life. It is so easy to allow the schedule to consume life. I think it takes wisdom and prayer to know when to say "No" to a good thing so we can say "Yes" to the best thing.

I am one for keeping a schedule - my kids need rest and too many outings in a week produces chaos in my house so... we do follow a schedule of sorts already. Right now our schedule is not over the top but a schedule can consume you by what you don't do. I see how easy it is to be consumed by a schedule of order, so that I don't break the rhythm of our day too. Going on outings during the scheduled nap can be a little trying on us and I've also said many "No's" to a better thing because I didn't know if I was up for the interruption to our schedule. Either err is not beneficial. It is important to LIVE life and not just plan life. I fight the urge to plan and keep order and not interrupt but I am learning to relax and LIVE! It's much more fun to get out of our box and see the world than to stay bound to a nap.

This 'type of family' comment really jumped out to me and my prayer is that our family remains a source of life for us and doesn't become a rat race. We aren't in the over-scheduled world yet and I pray we find the right rhythm for our family - a life giving rhythm and not always running a race that never ends. I also don't want to stop living for fear of life interrupting the easy schedule either. Such a balancing act but I want to live a full life that keeps living interesting.... not predictable and safe nor do I want to become so busy that we do not have time to enjoy anything because we are always running. Both extremes would be a sad choice. Oh for wisdom to keep life balanced so that it produces life and not regret.

Happy Mother's Day One and All

This has been a super fun weekend! Saturday was filled with laughter and exploration for the kids - digging in the backyard that is. Then today was just fabulous! My babies gave me my gift from them yesterday. They could not wait. They said "Dad, may we PULEEEEEEEEEEEZ give Mom our Masterpieces now??? PULEEEEEEEZE!?"By then the secret was almost out so - he allowed them to give me my gifts. Here is what HC created for me:
And here is JB's work. Truly Masterpieces right!? :)
I love my husband! What a super Daddy he is! He really planned this Mother's Day out right! I think the thing that makes it all the more special is that this year the kids 'get it'. They know it is a special day and so they continuously give me hugs and tell me how much they love me and they repeatedly tell me things like this "Happy Mother's Day Mom! You are the BEST Mom I've ever seen!" Who can resist that!? I am reminded today that at this stage of life - my kids run to Steve and I as we walk in the door and when we leave they are full of hugs and kisses! I know that there are many stages of parenting but for now I'm drinking in the abundance of love - it overfloweth in my house! Lord may HC and JB always love Steve and I AND each other! That is my Mother's Day wish today!

Happy Mother's Day to all you SUPER Mom's out there!!! May you have all the hugs/kisses/and appreciation that your heart desires!!

The Truth About Truth

I just returned from weekend retreat and there is MUCH spinning around in my head. The biggest thing of all is that God wants truth to rule and reign in our lives.

Truth is a must for living a fulfilling life. Being honest about my places of pain has become a surprising source of freedom lately. Rather than trying to 'suck it up' and go on, now I'm acknowledging how things really did/do hurt me and not trying to act like I'm fine. We often add sorrow to our own lives by trying to get over things instead of stopping to feel the hurt. We want to make it invisible but while pain hides in our heart - all it does is grow into a more vicious seeping oozing wound. Truth is freeing - although it is difficult to stop the bad habit of pretending we are OK.

Another freeing truth is having a proper perspective in life. The funny thing about the topic of perspective is that God had already been working on this topic in my life earlier this year and this was the main topic of our retreat. God's desire is for love to flow from the throne of God, through His Son, into our hearts and into the hearts of others. We cannot properly flow this way if we do not have a proper perspective. Our cycles of belief can distort our perspective and keep us bound in cycles of pain. This is not what God wants for us - He wants us to see clearly so that we can see our pain in proper perspective and then He can fully heal us in that area. It's kind of like when someone has an addiction. They cannot overcome the addiction until they are ready to admit they have a problem. Until you admit that you are hurting you are not usually ready to heal. It does require a choice on your part.

Bottom line is that His ways are higher than our ways, His thoughts are higher than our thoughts - that means they are better! He sees what we need and He hovers over us waiting, longing for us to want healing. His heart ACHES to heal us. He ACHES for us to be whole. He ACHES for us because if we would only allow Him to - He can free us. He ACHES for us to call out to Him in moments of distress. He ACHES for us to trust Him and rest in Him. He ACHES for us - He really really ACHES for us to be free! So much more can be said on this topic, but this is all I have for now. There may be more to come.

They Make Me Smile I Tell Ya!

(This sweet picture was taken by our photographer friend Mandy! She did an EXCELLENT job for our family photos! Click the photo and you will be directed to her website, so you can see more of her work! She is FABULOUS!)

I sure LOVE my kids! Today I was reminded of a sweet incident that I do not want to forget. Today my JB finished his lunch and I heard the water running. I said "Turn off that water!" JB said "I was just rinsing my plate Mom. I will turn it off after I rinse this last crumb." WOW! Gotta love that! What a nice surprise for my sweet boy to clean his plate.

The sweet memory this act brought to mind for me happened 2 Saturday's ago. Steve and I had an errand to run and a friend knew about it. She asked to keep the kids so that we could make the most of our errand time and we took her up on the offer. When I called to check in on the kids she said "I have to take a minute a brag on your kids! We were all eating sandwiches and JB finished his. HC got up and whispered something in JB's ear. JB immediately got up and took his plate and mine to the sink. Before I could say anything HC announced 'I taught him to be a gentleman for you.'"

My heart sang with pride! I mean - I teach them good habits but when the habits stick without my provoking them... that's when it seems the repetition is finally not for naught. I just had to take a minute and put this memory down on paper. :) I love being Mom! What an honor! And as a side note - I just pulled HC's 2nd tooth! This was my first go of tooth pulling and I was shockingly able. I usually cringe at the sight of a wobbly tooth so this was major progress for me! :)

ZOO DAY WITH DADDY!!!!

Today we visited the zoo with Daddy and saw a few cool creatures. We thought we would share some of our cool pics with you. Here we have the Tortoise. Snakes.
Toucan.
Stork. (Sure is an ugly one - we saw a prettier one too but I didn't snap a shot.)
Then we visited the birds and we found that Daddy has been hiding a special 'gift'.... he is.... THE BIRD WHISPERER.
Who knew?
He luckily left poo free. :)
A couple of minutes of fun in the Bamboo.
Then the kids finally rode the train! Praise Jesus - they FINALLY rode the train! :)
We were having BIG fun since Daddy was along for the fun.
We saw a few unique sites today - like these two were making out - their tales were even intertwined.
I've never seen the Rhino's walking around. They are usually laying around. This was a neat thing to see.
Camels.
The Giraffes were in rare form too. I love Giraffes. I can't decide if Giraffes are my ultimate favorite or...
if the Zebra's are my all time favorite.
Sleeping White Tiger.
Rarely do I see the Lions alert at all.
Meerkat - couldn't resist.
But I definitely love a good ole Bengal Tiger! GEAUX TIGERS! LSU!
Thanks for the fun idea Daddy! We've never had more fun at the zoo than when you join along in the fun! Loving the spring weather too!

Walking With The Dinosaurs

Tonight we went on a family adventure. We had a BLAST! I wasn't sure how strict they would be about taking pictures so I didn't tote my good camera along on this adventure. There was a fifty fifty chance we would not be allowed to use it, so that explains the gritty pictures. Here are me and HC, she enjoyed indulging in popcorn and most of all.... BLUE COTTON CANDY!! JB and Daddy - Daddy won tickets to this show by answering a question on the radio. Pretty cool huh?! What a smart Daddy HC and JB have! Thank you Daddy!
So here are a few glimpses of all the historic beasts we saw: Here is the Allosaurus on the left and the Stegosaurus on the right.
Here are two Brachiosaurus'.
They were HC's favorite - the long necked ones. They seemed less vicious and I think that is what makes them the most appealing to her.
This was HC and JB's LEAST favorite, the Pterosaur. JB kept telling Steve "I don't want that to fly by me."
Here are three Raptors eating another dinosaur carcass. HC kept saying "I feel sad for that dead dinosaur." See the Paleontologist in the picture? He was our narrator.
Here's the Torosaurus (with the spike coming out of it's ginormous head), a baby Tyrannosaurus, a Mommy one too, and finally a bumpy one with a large stone tail. The bumpy one was called an Ankylosaurus. The Torosaurus was JB's favorite.
Of course the Tyrannosaurus Rex Mommy and baby were the stars of the show - they nearly received a standing ovation. :)
Here are my two with the roaring dino teeth behind them.
What a fun night. Yay Daddy!

The End.

Spring is in the Air

The last week of February we had a special delivery. Our caterpillars arrived. Little did I know that these little creatures were going to be so fun. See them at the tippy top of the container? They are teeny here. And icky here. We had a total of 5 caterpillars and it was gross seeing all 5 of them in there. I'm not a caterpillar fan. Double ick! We noticed them at this size about 8 days after they arrived.
Then 3 or 4 days later we saw them do this.
Then within a day we saw the chrysalis appear. It is a bizarre thing to watch. How in the WORLD does this become a butterfly? I don't get it.
After they were in the chrysalis we were to wait for them to turn a darker color and then move them to our butterfly net. 4 of our 5 attached at the top of the container but 1 didn't make the climb. We put it in the net too, just in case it was still good.
On March 17th we saw that one butterfly made it's way out of the chrysalis. I wanted to watch this happen but we never managed to catch them exiting the chrysalis. See the lighter chrysalis - that's the empty one. Within 2 days they all emerged. The one that didn't hang with the others did become a butterfly but it had a torn wing. It was sad to see it flop around, it eventually died.
Here are the kids observing this latest development.Pretty neat huh?On Thursday we decided to set them all free. If you really look you will see one butterfly in center right and the damaged butterfly on the left of that butterfly.
The kids had a blast with this science project. See the butterfly on the rim?And the butterfly took a leap and landed on the ground. Before we knew it they all took off on their adventure to the big outdoors. Perfect timing too with all the pollen in much abundance.Here is one before it escaped our habitat.I wish we had the pretty yellow butterfly but this was fun even if it isn't the prettiest butterfly I've ever seen. :)
Change is happening all around us these days. It really feels like spring!